Well, yesterday I began my training fro my new job. It wasn’t torture, but it was a long day. Actually, I think this job could end up being “not horrible”. I’m already beginning to strategize on how I can infuse my witness with my work as I interact with people I normally would not be able to interact with. Hopefully I can come up with something that will not conflict with or compromise my work ethic. I really hope I can make it work, because I need something else to drive me with this job besides greed. Unfortunately, my training is firmly rooted in greed. It’s a commission job, and the commission is very good, but the result of that is the fact that money is the objective. My success will be measured solely on my performance, on how much money I make. I will have to take an extra measure to protect myself from loving money and making it, and focus my efforts on being excellent in my work and putting value in the people, not the profit. But, as I said, we are being trained to make money the sole motivating factor. So what will motivate me, if not money? Going door to door is not motivating. Even talking with people is not motivating for someone like me. I will have to bend my heart and make other things motivating. Total strangers will have to become valuable to me. Doing a good job at something that doesn’t interest me will have to become satisfying to me. Making money will have to mean more to me than happiness. It will have to mean God’s provision for Katy and me. It will have to mean savings, not spending. So, needless to say, this will be an interesting month or so. I don’t know how long I will be doing this, but regardless, I will have to try very hard at not stumbling, not loving what is only temporary, but loving what is truly of value to God. I must be diligent in following the heart of God in what I do. I hope I don’t screw this up. I have a lot of ground to make up for.
So this is my life as of today. Avoiding worldliness as I am being completely submerged into it. This is what is difficult for someone who is only used to working in a church environment. It is easy to guard against fleshly things when you have the church walls protecting you. “Ministry guys” are rookies when it comes to real world experience, I believe. But that doesn’t mean it is hopeless. It just means we have to be strong and obedient. I’ll start working tomorrow. I’m sure I will continue to keep posting on topics such as these, due to the fact that this job will occupy 80 percent of my life from now on. I’ll just take it one day at a time and pray that God will see me through and provide for me and my wife.